Putting oneself out there, really, really out there is a hard thing to do. As a business owner and a leader I feel this more and more acutely everyday. I have a quote on the fridge that I visit often, when I'm grabbing half and half (many times a day), or actual food (fewer times).
"Everything you have ever wanted is on the other side of fear" - George Addair
How does one jump over the fear hurdle to the other side? How's the landing?
Well, I'm not entirely sure. I mean, I definitely jumped in my life but I usually check to make sure there's water in the pool before I do it. It still might hurt, I still might belly flop but at least I tried.
That's kind of how I feel with this business we are working on and what we are doing. I have no idea if it'll actually work out, I'm hoping it will. It may be that we can low-key sustain ourselves but not really grow. It may be that we have to pivot. That's ok - it's the content of what we learned about ourselves that I'm trying to hold first as a measure of success.
In my consulting career, I've seen leaders truly jump when fearful to that unknown other side. Seeing good people make that leap is what plays in my head when I think about my own case, and I keep repeating those moments I watched when someone close to me - a boss, mentor, or colleague - made the jump and could probably only hear the voice in their head asking about the landing, and the blood rushing through their veins.
It's the leaders that stood in front of the entire company and said "you know, I've done some soul searching and I'm not quite ready to take the helm yet" that truly inspired me. Or the small business owner that saw a niche in the market, had the skills to try and decided to hold on as tight as possible to building a business, for himself and his family.
The more weeks that go by as a small business owner, not just a sole proprietor anymore, but a partnership, the more I come to respect the people that came before me and showed me how. I'm starting to understand the fear so much more. They told me the stories of the dark times and the fear, and yet they held on. The fact they told me at all is powerful in itself. Getting to experience the fear is a blessing.
They are not my stories to tell so I'm not naming names, of course, but all the things I do now is on the shoulders of leaders that I saw early in my career be open and honest, daring and bold, and relentless in their pursuits.
What was it they believed in so strongly that was worth holding on to, or letting go of?
From what I can tell, it's worth jumping to the other side of fear when:
Your support net is strong. You want to test out your own path or idea and you have enough bandwidth emotionally to do so. You have a support system around you that will help with this emotionally, financially, and listen to your woes and fears. Sometimes it's an extra bit of money in the bank, sometimes it's friends and a network that will really tell you the truth about your ideas. Support is key.
You've done something kinda like it before, this time with a small twist. I'm not a gymnast but I've seen them do daring feats that are proven moves upon proven moves. Seems like the most likely moves that'll stick are ones that are just a little off the center of what you've already proven somehow. If it's consulting on your own with work you know how to do, then yes. If it's branching out in any way at all, make sure the trunk of your tree is stable enough to hold the new growth.
You have to accept a new reality. I've seen some really uncomfortable moments in my career, where I many hours later saying 'wow, that must have really been hard'. From leaders having to admit that they couldn't sustain a staff and do a round of layoffs, to admitting something went terribly wrong and breaking trust, they all had to stand up for what reality was.
I think it was my mother who would tell me that fear and excitement are the same chemical in the body. Growing up I was an introvert, still very much am. Accepting these new fears (I guess that'd be number three up there) of developing business when it just would be easier to get a full time job, telling my story to understand why I'm doing this (and maybe to help others), and putting myself out there is truly terrifying. I'm not changing from an introvert at all, but I'm changing the way I look at fear, breaking it down and sitting with it as I reach out of my comfort zone.
I wonder if this is how everyone who taught me how to do this felt.
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